everything flawed.

Sometimes you have to let things go so there’s room for better things to come into your life.

2011-02-03T10:56:00.000+08:00

tears&pain&stress&love.

2010-04-07T15:56:00.003+08:00

what's been keeping me busy: photo editing :)

la mia ultima aggiunta ♥

meet my baby.

2010-03-05T23:11:00.001+08:00

tikoy. :)

a no-smoking sign on your cigarette break.

2010-02-12T23:11:00.005+08:00

have you realized how ironic life can be?

just when you realized how important something is, you lose it. TRAGIC.

isn't it ironic that the only thing that makes you happy is also the only thing that makes you feel sad? and isn't it more ironic to hate the people you love?

im trying my best not to be as straight as an arrow. i don't want to talk about it here.

i just need to vent my feelings.

do we really need to lose what we have just to realize how important it is?

or was it our choice? OUR CHOICE TO LEARN THINGS THE HARD WAY.

a little TOO IRONIC.

old photographs.

2010-01-28T11:11:00.000+08:00

pictures fade but they never change.. even if everything in it does.

so, yeah.. i killed the DRAMA QUEEN inside me. it was like burying myself alive.
and now i feel like i am going to grieve over this loss for the rest of my life.

I LOST MYSELF.

the greatest loss i've ever had.

goodbye, self.

never too late.

2009-12-30T23:11:00.004+08:00

/it's never too late.

i HATE changes. but, YES. I KNOW. and we all know for a fact that everything does... CONSTANTLY. and we have to accept it, whether we like it or not..

i live in a world where change is just as weird as the word bulastog.
and for the last 17 years, i have been avoiding it.

IDKW.

maybe because i'm so afraid of losing and moving on..
or maybe because i'm just not that interested.

i don't really know.

but i believe i can change. i just don't..
BECAUSE IT IS EASIER NOT TO.

I AM WHO I AM.
AND I WANT TO BE ACCEPTED FOR JUST THAT.

but change is not that bad at all..
especially when it's for the better.

and i think it's about time that we all make a room for it.

CHANGE.
for the better. it isn't too late.

happy new year everyone! :)) --B.

left > lost

2009-12-05T11:11:00.001+08:00

"what is left is more important than what is lost."

it's only now that i realized what that statement was trying to make me realize. sheesh. im kind of slow. haha! that's what comparative anatomy does to my brain cells, it's killing them softly. LOL. going back, i realized how much time i've wasted crying over things that are never to come back in my life.. and how blind i was. SO BLIND. that i never saw the people around me. the people who stood by my side, rain or shine.. through thick and thin. goshh. why only now?

i can never gain back what is lost.. no matter how many tears i cry, no matter how hard i try. what's lost is LOST. and i should not fill up my heart with regrets, i should not spend my whole life thinking how it could have been if i didn't lose it. it's a TOTAL WASTE OF TIME AND ENERGY.. right? it's not practical.

why should i cry over someone who's never coming back, when i have so many friends who are always by my side?

there could never be anything more important than FRIENDS; olnly friends come with a lifetime insurance. :)

SO LOVE THEM.

seasons of love.

2009-11-09T23:11:00.023+08:00

Christmas 2009 is coming in just 45 days

wasn't that tickling to the eyes? thanks to that pop up, it gave me the idea of posting something not as serious as my last two posts. it also made me think of putting a countdown clock on my page. haha! well, i can work on that later. let's talk about Christmas first..

yes, CHRISTMAS. who doesn't love it?

it's my favorite time of the year! when the leaves fall off the trees.. oh, it looks so dramatic! haha. when the wind is cold and everyone gets to wear their jackets, when old friends get to catch up.. beautiful scenario, isn't it?

it's such a magical season.

don't you just love putting up the Christmas tree, hearing dawn mass, listening to Christmas carols, shopping, wrapping gifts and eating until you burst? typical Filipino Christmas.. very festive. and i know it will still be the same this year. even after all the hardships that the Filipino people have been through.. they will still put up their Christmas trees.

that's why i love being a Filipino. no matter what happens, we keep the spirit of Christmas alive.
and it only shows what Christmas really means to us...

it's time to spread some EL-OH-VEE-EE. ♥

presto.

2009-11-08T23:11:00.001+08:00

time goes by... SO FAST.

how i wish i have super powers like Hiro Nakamura's. ever since then, time has been my worst enemy. and i really need to think of something for me to be able to defeat it.

i stared at the clock for a long time and tried to stop it's hands. it seemed like it's ticking went faster as i stared. and i was really pissed. i felt like the clock was trying to test my patience. but maybe things like that aren't really possible and can only happen on tv. maybe i was so into HEROES that i forgot to think of reality. and so i gave up and tried to think of something else..

"maybe no one can stop time." i thought, "the best thing we can do is to MAKE THE MOST OUT OF IT."

step one..

2009-11-03T23:11:00.004+08:00

brave is the one who chose to let go..

"you have to leave the baggage, dear. MOVE ON."
--N

and so i had another epiphany (sudden realization of great truth). thanks to N. :D

after the moment of enlightenment, i went inside my room and opened the drawer under my bed, where i keep piles of letters and other antique stuff. "jeez." i said to myself, "do i have plans on growing molds inside my drawer?" Nelica was right, i shouldn't hold on to something that needs to go. i need to allot a space for new things to be able to enter my life. if i will choose to hold on to these things, then i might miss the things that are more worthy. if i will keep myself confined inside the walls of the past, then i might not see the beauty that is waiting outside. i don't want to miss the magic moment.

as the famous song goes..
I DON'T WANT TO MISS A THING.

and so i decided to let go of the things that i've been keeping for so long. this is the perfect time to use my skill. the skill of FORGETTING. i didn't know it can be as hard as remembering.

i closed my eyes and counted from one to three..

...and i know i did the right thing. because not everything is for keeps.

b is for brand new.

2009-10-26T23:11:00.004+08:00

and so everything looked brand new. but nothing's really changed.

hey everyone! i'm so back. missed me much? :D now's my chance to blog whatever i want to blog. i felt so deprived of happiness for the past five months. i haven't got a single chance to update my blog because i need to spend all my nights reading that jumbo zoo book. and i know my blog was so jealous of my frog. but now my zoo-keeping days are so overr! and it's only YOU and ME, bloggie. :D oh my God, this is THE life. :D easy, slow and free of stinky formalin. i missed this!

and since i have all the time to waste now, i grabbed the opportunity to pamper my blog and make it feel loved. i know the layout looks too different, but it's still the same blog. same archive. same everything. i just wanted to give it a brand new look. a total make over. i actually got the "barbie-hater" concept from my professor in literature, Prof. John Jack Wigley. credits, sir! :D my blog has turned into an anti-barbie site. haha!

sorry, barbie. ;P

double u tee eff.

2009-08-22T11:11:00.000+08:00

i woke up this morning and realized that the population of my stuffed cows has really grown huge. and now, i can only sleep on 3/4 portion of my bed because 1/4 is occupied by my precious collection.

i remember what my dad told me.. "Ang tanda tanda mo na, ganyan pa rin ang gusto mo!" ..as i was standing outside ANIMALAND, dreaming.

BTW.//FYI.

ANIMALAND - is a toy store where you can get your stuffed animals personalized, or you can make your own and put as many stuffs as you like in it. you can even put a recordable thingy inside it. cool right? though it will really cost you much, unlike other stuffed animals which you can buy in average toy stores.

going back..

i didn't mind what my dad said because he says that all the time. i just kept on staring at the stuffed animals from outside the store, like i don't have any plans on growing up and giving away my stuffed cows for charity. well, its not that i'm not into charity works, i just.. i'm not ready! i can't just give them away like some old clothes that don't fit anymore. they're too important to me. i'm willing to give but.. NOT MY COWS! can i just give you something else? haha! greedy little monster.

you all know how much my stuffed cows mean to me. i love them so much that i would sleep on the floor just to make them feel comfortable.

uh. WTF?

a sob story

2009-07-19T11:11:00.000+08:00

my blog is so, like, OUT-OF-DATE. like, i haven't posted anything since i went back to school after a long week of suspension due to that fuckin h1n1 flu. i've been very busy with my studies. and right now, i'm still in the process of adjusting to my new environment and to my new study habits. seriously, occupational therapy is a social suicide. don't take up OT if you really love your social life. XD but hey, i'm starting to love it. :D i'm starting to gain new friends. like, friends that i'm really comfortable with. well, they're really very few compared to my high school friends, but it's ok. i'd rather have few real friends than thousands of fake. hah! XD anyway. i'm still working on my college goals post. like, i promised myself i would post it before the opening of classes.. but i haven't finished it until now. haha! well, i told you i'm very busy. **yayaya. whatev. i'll continue working on it and i'll post it as soon as i can. :D i promise! haha! that's all for now, just wanna update you guys, and my inaamag na blog. XD i still have to study very hard for our first shifting exams. :D

mabuhay ka, social life! rer.

hi billie :]

2009-06-26T23:11:00.000+08:00

i can still remember my first blog.. SCENiC DRiVE.
and i am starting to miss it! **sobs

yeah, enough with the reminiscence! XD

just visit my new blog!
http://teenheartache.blogspot.com/
and meet Billie, my alter ego. :D

if only i can turn back time..

2009-06-22T23:11:00.001+08:00

i wanted to prove myself that i can write something more interesting than the usual stuff, that's why i decided to make an interview. it was kind of survey-type and i only conducted it online.. XD i asked people to write something, essay or whatever type, given the subject: "THE BEST THING ABOUT HIGH SCHOOL"

unfortunately, only few were able to respond to my call. it was supposed to be TOP TEN BEST THINGS ABOUT HIGH SCHOOL but due to lack of respondents, i was imposed to make it TOP FIVE BEST ANSWERS instead.. so here it is, the fruit of my hard work. hahaha!

THE BEST THING ABOUT HIGH SCHOOL
TOP 5 BEST ANSWERS

#1 “The best thing about high, hmmmm where do I start..?? Many interesting things happened in the past 4 years of my life, so much happenings that when you ask me the question "WHAT IS THE BEST THING ABOUT HIGH SCHOOL?" I don't know where to start. Sure there were some hardships and trials that we encountered along the way but as students we were to face them with courage and joy, joy because as high school students we were not alone, we have our friends to help us till the end, and we know for a fact that they will be with us doing what they do best, encouraging us to do better. Aside from the hardships I also know that our ever supportive educators with us. Sure sometimes they have to act as the bad guy but at the end of the day we know that they never meant to do those things, they were just teaching us that life isn't all just butterflies and rainbows. They were showing us the real side of life that we might never see until we experienced it our selves. In a way that they were doing it to protect us from the harsh reality. My former adviser once told me, "education shouldn't be limited in the four corners of the class room, instead we should expand our knowings to the extend outside the walls of the class room."
Finally I can say that the time that we spent in the school was also great. In a way that it was the best experience of our lives, some say "the best 4 years of their lives" for some memories that would never be separated from them. This only proves that nothing would replace high school in our hearts and minds but also there would only be a handful of thoughts would top the smiles, the laughter, the tears, and many more things that high school did to our lives.
And if you ask me what is the best thing about high school? Based on the friends, teachers and things that happened in the last 4 years I would answer "The very meaning of high school is already the best thing you could get".

--Marvin Castillo

#2 “There's such a thing as constant change. No matter how hard we try to keep things as they are, there will always be something different, something more. High School will always be the stage of changes and growth not only physically but emotionally, and spiritually as well. For some, it is the 'make or break' part of the educational journey. What we become in High School will be the basis of what future is in store for us. Yet, despite all these expectations and conceptions about it, we really couldn't fully define what High School is.

So start with the next thing to define: the best thing about it.

JS Promenades, school fairs, academic and extra curricular activities, acing college entrance exams, and even scoring points with the school heart throbs are just some of the factors which define the boundaries of this so called momentous stage. Everyone has the chance to start anew. Everyone is given the chance to start with a clean plate since High School is considered to be a new beginning. It is the phase of being more mature than a grade school pupil yet still being juvenile about life.

Discoveries. From the student handbook to the different clubs and organizations, there are a lot of things to discover in High School. It doesn't matter if you're a freshman, a sophomore, a junior or a senior since every year, you discover something new and interesting which will be the building blocks of your personality. Nothing fruitful will happen if you decide to be immature, a push over, or just plain shy. Opportunities will knock on your door but it is up to you to open it. Adjustments may bring all kinds of discomfort but these adjustments will not cease to help you grow as an individual. Making friends is an essential part of High School for these people are really for keeps. During those 4 years of growing and learning together, unbreakable bonds of friendship will be formed which will be something you'll be glad to have. Together, you'll be able to discover, learn, and experience from each other. To fully enjoy this phase, avoid being selfish with the spotlight, being bossy, being a procrastinator, and a stranger. Everything you learn in High School will be beneficial not only in the future but in the present as well. Being too perked up and neat is a thing of the past. Being yourself is more than enough and it will surely be a picker upper if you finish High School with flying colors. Remember to always look back because you wouldn't be where you are now if you didn't take the first step which is to discover.

The best part of High School is discoveries. High School isn't High School without any of it.”

--Anna Del Rosario

#3 “It made me think since it's THING, not THINGS. But nothing can beat the only thing that I had in mind, FRIENDS!

that was short but I know it means a lot.. I love you friends!”

--Leslie Velina

#4 “ALLOOOOOWANCE! And the chance to spend it all on FOOOOOD. XDD”

--Georgia Moises

“BEST BUDS. Need i say more?”

--Jameela Malicdem

#5 “Everything about high school is the BEST! And it’s really sad to know that after four years of hardcore fun, things will never be the same again. But I know, high school will always be part of us, and we will forever be high school students in our hearts.”

--yours truly :D

and wait, before i end this.. i would like to give an advice to those who are still in high school and to those who are just about to arrive at the most unforgettable part of their life..

HIGH SCHOOL is only once in a lifetime, make the most out of it. ENJOY and STUDY HARD at the same time.. :D

i hope my advice would help! XD

i should do this often, i really enjoyed working on this.. :D i miss high school so much and this reminded me of how wonderful the "good old times" were. **tears
well, it is true. some things only happen in high school.

and so you're back from outer space..

2009-06-05T11:11:00.002+08:00

girls have this intrinsic passion for slumber parties, pajama parties and the like.. and it makes me wonder why they call such rituals as "sleepover" when they don't even sleep at all. why not call it a chat-over, eat-over or a kilitian-over instead? why sleepover?

i remember hosting a sleepover when i was 9, we used to call it a kilitian party then. because we spend all nights tickling each other. it was a lot like the "pass the message" game, but you pass tickles instead of messages. funny right? well, that's what girls do. they love to spend long hours chatting, eating and giggling with their girlfriends. no wonder why they have super strong bonds. they shop together, laugh together, sometimes they take showers together, scream together and cry over nicholas sparks' novels-turned-movies together. they know very well every little molecule and atom of each other, and they accept each other for just that. they listen patiently to what each other has to say, even the lamest love and heart break stories. they share stuff with each other and help each other out. i think that's what makes girl power SUPER and their bond so strong, that no bitch nor any stupid guy can break.

girls can live without boys. as long as they have their girlfriends, they will survive.

they all think they know her..

2009-05-26T11:11:00.005+08:00

i remember my interview in UST's College of Rehabilitation Sciences.. the first thing that the interviewer said the very moment i sat on the chair was exactly: "So, tell us something about yourself." and trust me, you don't want to know what happened next. haha! but i wonder, if she would ask me the same question on a different setting and situation, what would i say?

my name is Bianca Isabel Ilagan Flores. pero Bea ang nickname ko, hindi Isay. idol kasi ng mama ko si Bea Lucero noong mga panahong malaki ang tiyan niya. Beatrice dapat ang pangalan ko, pero nabaduyan ang napakaCOOL kong tatay. kaya nagsuggest ang paborito kong uncle na bakit hindi na lang daw Bianca ang ipangalan sa akin, tutal medyo malapit naman ito sa Bea na pinagpipilitan ni mama na maging nickname ko.. agad namang sumangayon ang tatay ko para lang hindi matuloy ang maitim na balak ng nanay ko na pangalanan akong Beatrice. sukang suka daw siya sa pangalang 'yon e. pero kung tatanungin mo ako ngayon kung ano ang mas gusto ko sa dalawang pangalan, isang malaking WALA ang isasagot ko sa'yo. pero ok na sa akin ang Bianca, wala naman kasi akong pakialam kung ano ang tawag ng mga tao sa akin. as long as tinatawag nila ako. nasunod din naman ang nanay ko kahit pano dahil ang second name ko ay pangalan ng kanyang favorite auntie na namayapa matagal na panahon na ang nakalipas. ang ibig-sabihin ng pangalan kong 'yon ay "My God is a vow" sa Greek. at ang tamang pagpronounce ay IZ ah bell. mahaba ang tunog ng letter i at ang s ay binibigkas ng parang letter z, matigas. pero wala pa rin akong pakialam kung pano mo ipopronounce. bahala ka na. :]

patpatin at iyakin ako noong bata ako, ayoko ng mga ulam na kung anu anong nakalagay. gusto ko simple lang. prito, ganun.. kaya ang payat payat ko. pwedeng gawing gitara ang ribs ko at lagi akong nagkakasakit. sa tuwing oras na ng pagkain at ayoko ng nakahandang ulam, magtatago ako sa cabinet sa ilalim ng lababo kung saan kasyang kasya ang buto't balat kong katawan. lalabas lang ako kapag wala na akong naririnig na kalembang ng mga plato. naaalala ko ang tukso sa akin dati ng mga kalaro ko ay "sticky stick" kung tutuusin ay mas maganda na nga siguro yun. ngayon, sa hindi maipaliwanag na dahilan, ay maaari na akong mapagkamalang isang true to life-butanding na inanod sa lupa. tulad ng dati, lubos pa rin ang pagibig ko sa pritong hotdog. siya talaga ang first love ko. gayun man, natuto na din akong kumain ng mga komplikadong pagkain tulad ng adobo. in fact, kahit anong ihain sa akin ay kinakain ko... bukod sa chicken nuggets, instant pancit canton at kahit anong bagay na may bahid ng carrots. dahil sinusuka ko lang ang mga bagay na 'yon. hindi ko rin alam kung bakit. medyo maarte ang bituka ko. :]

lumaki ako sa isang environment kung saan ang mga katulong ay hooked na hooked sa tsismis. laging nagtsitsismisan, umaga, tanghali, gabi.. walang pinipiling oras ang mga bibig nila, basta may bagong tsismis, kusa itong bubuka. parang SNN. Showbiz News Ngayon. as in NOW NA! kahit madilim na e lalabas pa rin ang mga alagad ni tita Cristy para magpalitan ng kuro-kuro tungkol sa latest chika. at isa ang dati kong yaya sa kanila. may pagka-maldita 'yon kaya hindi ko feel. aba, walang ibang pwedeng maging maldita kundi ako lang. pero di naman ako umubra. wala akong magawa kundi samahan siya na libutin ang buong neighborhood at katukin ang bawat bahay para sumagap ng tsismis sa mga amiga. wala akong choice. dahil kung hindi, mag-isa lang akong maiiwan sa bahay. siya rin siguro ang dahilan kung bakit hindi ako mapakali pag nasa bahay lang ako. gusto ko laging nasa labas. pero nagbago na rin ang lahat ngayon, lagi na lang akong nasa loob ng kwarto at hindi na nakikita kahit na anino ko sa labas ng bahay namin. kung alam ko lang, siguro tsinitsismis na rin nila ako.. baka buntis. siguro nag-drugs. at kung anu-ano pa. OA! masyado naman akong sexy para maging buntis at masyado namang mataba para maging adik. lumalabas pa rin naman ako no?! pag tulog na ang lahat. nocturnal ang drama ko e. haha! atsaka hindi pa naman ako ganun kalala gaya ng iniisip nila. :]

gaya ng bituka ko, medyo maarte din ang mga batang babae sa paligid ko. kaya siguro ganito ako. saksakan ng kaartehan. e ako lang ata ang gising nung nagsabog ng kaartehan si Kris Aquino, kaya nabiyayaan ako ng marami. sagana ba? haha! surplus. sabi nga ng isa sa mga kaibigan ko, banidosa daw ako. masyado daw akong maarte. siguro dahil sa alcohol na di mawalay sa katawan ko, at sa follow up na moisturizer para di madry ang skin! hindi naman talaga ako masyadong maarte, (take note: MASYADO! haha! ibigsabihin.. maarte talaga, hindi lang todo. haha!) umiiwas lang ako sa sari-saring uri ng fucking flu. sabi nga nila, dinala ko na daw buong bahay namin. siguro dahil may built-in clinic ako sa loob ng bag ko.. hay, whatever! basta ang alam ko lumaki ako na isang "mean girl" dahil ang alam ko, sa mundong ginagalawan ko, hindi ako magsusurvive kung hindi ako magiging maldita. mayaman sa girl power ang mundo ko. para bang mga prinsesa kaming nagkukumpetisyon. lahat gustong manalo. lahat gustong sila ang masunod. pero di nagtagal, nagsawa din ako at hindi ko na kinarir ang pakikipagkumpetisyon sa kanila, pati na rin ang pagpapalago sa king mga sungay. nagexplore ako. sinubukan kong sumama sa iba't ibang klase ng tao, iba't ibang mga grupo na rin ang nasalihan ko. kaya sa palagay ko, marunong na akong kumilala ng mga tao sa kilos pa lang. pero hindi pa rin pala. sadyang mapagpanggap ang mundo ko. at nasa'yo lang ang desisyon kung magpapanggap ka o hindi. kung magiging mabait ka o magiging maldita. kung ano ako sa dalawa? siguro.. somewhere in between. :]

nag aral ako ng pre-school at grade school sa siyudad. edi ako na city girl! bwaha! dito naman kasi talaga kami nakatira. pero since nagrebelde ako ng maaga ay napagdesisyunan ng mga magulang ko na pag-aralin ako sa malayong catholic school. sa probinsya. pero hindi naman masyadong probinsya doon, hindi lang katulad ng mundong kinalakhan ko. araw-araw pa rin naman akong umuuwi sa bahay dahil hindi naman kalayuan ang school ko. 5:30 pa lang ay umaalis na ako sa bahay, kaya't hindi ako nakikita ng mga tsismosa. sa gabi naman ay halos 8:00 na ako nakakauwi. nagaaral ako habang naghihintay ng sundo at natutulog naman ako sa sasakyan pati sa banyo, habang naliligo. pag dating ko sa school, bagong gising pa talaga ako. define bagong gising! haha! ang pinakamalapit na mall doon ay Olivarez, na ang mga taga roon lang ang nakakaalam. ang laki nito ay wala pa sa kalahati ng sukat ng mga mall na araw-araw kong tinatambayan noon, dahil halos kapit bahay lang namin. wala akong kilala sa school bukod sa mangilan-ngilan na naging schoolmate ko na dati. pero marami akong naging kaibigan. dahil di katulad ng mundo ko dati, ang mundong 'to ay napupuno ng mga totoong tao. na paprangkahin ka at sasabihan ka ng POKPOK! sa muka mo. minsan ouch talaga. pero mabuti na ang ganito. alam mo kung sino ang kaaway mo. pero, wala naman akong naging mga kaaway dun. meron man ay isa o dalawa lang siguro, at 'yung iba ay noong una lang. naging mga kaibigan ko rin ang mga loko. at hindi naging hadlang ang pagiging catholic school ng school ko para gumawa pa rin ako ng konting kalokohan. pero konti na lang naman. :]

sabi nila, susyal daw ako. pero hindi nila alam, baduy ako.. JOLOGS. ang wardrobe ko ay composed basically ng jeans, shorts at mga statement shirts. wala ng iba. sabi ko, "simple lang kasi ako" pero ang totoo.. tamad lang talaga akong mag-ayos. dahil alam ko namang kahit anong ayos ko e wala na akong igaganda. ganto na talaga ako. madalas, "nasalanta outfit" lang ang suot ko. nagsimula akong tawagin 'yon sa ganung pangalan simula noong sinalanta ng bagyong Milenyo ang Pilipinas. tumambay kami sa bahay ng isang kaibigan ko, nakasuot ako ng simpleng shorts, simpleng tee at messy ponytail. sabi nila muka daw akong nasalanta. pero ang totoo, maayos naman ang bahay namin, hindi tinangay ng bagyo ang mga damit ko at nakapaglaba naman si yaya. sadyang ganun lang.. tinatamad akong pumorma. hindi ko din naman talaga sinusuklay ang aking "long, golden locks" kung tawagin nila.. pero hindi rin ito gold, parang kumupas na brown ang kulay ng buhok ko. parang kalawang. hindi ko mawari kung bakit tuwang tuwa sila dito, kahit minsan ko lang kung suklayin. hindi naman daw halata. minsan, sila na lang ang nagsusuklay sa akin dahil never ko talagang gagawin 'yon. ang nanay ko lang ang gumagawa noon, bago ako pumasok sa school. gigising siya ng maagang maaga para lang suklayan ako. hindi ko na kasi maabot ang dulo dahil masyadong mahaba. haha! pero exaggeration ko lang naman yun, tinatamad lang talaga akong suklayin ang mahaba kong buhok. at sabi din ni mama, aabutin daw ako ng siyam siyam. 9:09? aba. masyado na atang late 'yon! tapos na siguro ang dalawa o tatlong subject ko, at malamang e morning break ko na. pinakalate ko na 'yung 8:00, isang oras matapos tumunog ang bell, dahil na rin sa traffic at sa pagiinarte ko. kaya mabuti pa nga ay ipaubaya ko na sa kanya ang trabahong 'yon. sa gabi naman, ang tatay ko ang walang sawang nagbabrush ng buhok ko. minsan, nakakapagduda na talaga siya. pero natutuwa lang naman daw siya sa "long, golden locks" ko kaya.. sige na nga! :]

wirdo din daw ako. totoo naman. kahit ako e sangayon sa kaisipang 'yon. matanda na ako pero patuloy pa rin akong nangongolekta ng stuffed toy na baka. paborito ko ang baka (as in buhay na baka) simula noong bata pa ako. tuwang tuwa ako sa mga leeg nila. at hanggang ngayon, pag napapadaan kami sa mga bukid at nakakakita ako nito, napapasigaw ako ng malakas.. BAKAAA! na parang batang sobrang excited. pinagtatawanan nila ako. pero ok lang, ginagawa ko pa rin. di ko mapigilan e! pangarap ko talaga ang makasakay sa baka, at hanggang hindi natutupad ang pangarap ko.. patuloy akong sisigaw ng BAKAAA! sa tuwing makakakita ako nito. :]

marami rin ang nagsasabing MISTERYOSO ako. mahirap daw makita kung ano talaga ang tunay na pagkatao ko. marami daw akong tinatagong sikreto. pero sa palagay ko, nakapikit lang ang mga taong nagsasabi noon. o di kaya ay ipinanganak na bulag. ikaw, ano sa palagay mo? :]

i wish i didn't wish so hard..

2009-05-20T23:11:00.000+08:00

after i finished reading that book, i sat down, stared blankly in space and started to think. the first time i saw that book, it really captured my heart. i felt like i was the "B" it was pertaining to. i felt like someone wrote it for me. and i expected much that the story would end happily. but unfortunately, it didn't. and i felt like my story didn't end up the way i wanted it to. maybe im just so used to happily ever afters. but i have to admit, things don't always turn out that way.

most of the time, i plan things. and i expect things to turn out according to my plan. but i realized, things don't need to be put into plans. anything that's too planned won't work out. sometimes, we just need to let them be. let them happen according to His plan.

i couldn't help but to think that i ruined everything by planning it all too much.

..maybe i wished our love apart.

you're the nicest thing i've ever seen

2009-05-18T23:11:00.000+08:00

and i wish we could see if we could be something. ♥

stays preserved in my mind

2009-05-15T23:11:00.000+08:00

i heard a song on a friend's profile on friendster, and all of a sudden it made me want to write something about a guy that once played a big role in my life. the sweet memories and all the beautiful things that we shared.. as friends.

he was my friend before i realized that there was something else.. something MORE. but then a lot of things changed. until one day, i woke up and suddenly.. we weren't friends anymore. it's really hard for me to talk about him after everything that happened, since he was the reason for my first heart break. sometimes i wish i can just forget it all at once. but most of the time i wish it never happened. i wish we could have everything back. i miss him.

now, it makes me wonder why that song reminded me of him when i think i don't even know the song.. though it really sounded familiar. it took me hours to dredge up everything that happened during the prom night. i remember perfectly the beautiful words that he said. even his last words before we parted. he said "tapos na." in a very cheerless way, as if he didn't want the night to end. neither did i.

**sighs.

yeah, i remember.
that song was playing during the last dance! (well, according to my friends.) it didn't get any of my attention, for i was so busy dancing with him. next scenario.. the day after the prom, i was asking my friends.. "ano yung last song?" and how come i didn't remember it when it was supposed to be unforgettable for me.

strange how i remember the exact words that he said and not even recall a single line from the song. stranger than that, it reminded me of him. the sunset. the big old tree. the fireworks. the late night road trips. the long talks. everything.

those are the things that still linger in my memory.. the rest, i don't want to remember. i just want to be reminded of how beautiful things used to be. and how it could still be. even though we didn't end up together, i still want to hold onto it. because i realized that he's still my friend, and it's not too late to bring back everything that we had before.

i don't want to ruin all the wonderful memories just because of that one, not so nice thing.. and i guess it's about time to forgive, and forget as well. after all, we still had a lot of sparks. and he will always have that special place in my heart, since nothing can change the fact that he is and he will always be..

my first love. ♥

a little too emotional

2009-05-13T23:11:00.001+08:00

"so true. so painful."

i spent almost 24 hours inside my room, just lying on my bed and reading books that i've already read. and just now, i realized that the last time i went to the kitchen was actually last night, around 9 pm, to eat a bunch of yupi gummy bears and to take my vitamins. and it's already 5:30 pm on my watch, that i've only worn once when i was still 12. "omg. i must be very hungry now." so, i went downstairs and grabbed the first thing that i saw. WOW! sky flakes. very heavy for my first meal. **grin :D as i was munching aggressively on the poor cracker, i realized.. hey, i need something to drink! so, i went to the fridge and found an orange purée. i didn't have much time to be choosy, so i gave it a quick pour and added water right away. YUCK. that was the worst orange juice that i have ever tasted. but i didn't have any choice but to drink it. and as i was about to take my second to the last sip, i had another realization.. i'm eating a physically sick person's food! but i didn't mind. i was so excited to go back to my room and continue reading "Para kay B", the third book for this day.

unlike the first two books, it's my first time to read this book. and also my first time to read a novel written in Filipino. it was about a writer, who wrote 5 different and exotic love stories for the woman he loves. i wasn't able to finish the book since it's already late when i started reading it. and i had to go to bed or else something bad will happen. **laugh XD so, i put it under my pillow and switched off the light. but i didn't fall asleep that easy. i was so excited to know the ending. i was so close to the part that says "ang totoong nangyari" but then, i heard a voice.. "BEA, MATULOG KA NA!" uh. kontrabida. i admit. i read this book because i was curious about the title. the first time i saw it on top of a table, in one of the rooms here in our house, i felt like it was written for me. i picked it up, brought it inside my room and read it. and i fell in love with it. i was really excited to know what really happened. who is B? what happened to Irene, Sandra, Erica and Ester? and then i fell asleep. i woke up early the next morning. for unknown reasons. i searched under my pillow and began reading.. this time, im going to finish it. but as i was on the last page of the book, i felt sad. very disappointed. for i felt like my love story didn't end up the way i wanted it to. i sat in front of the tv and turned it on only to ignore it. i was so into the story, that i felt like i was one of the main characters. and when it didn't end the way that i expected it, i felt so sad. the story was so realistic for a fictional novel. so true. so painful.

and i was so affected.

think twice

2009-05-10T23:11:00.000+08:00

escaping from a bad experience is like deleting your friendster account just to avoid someone.

it's not as easy as you think it is. imagine losing hundreds of your cyberfriends just to get rid of one. and the hardest part is.. you have to create a brand new account. sad isn't it?

now, if you think you're ready to leave your life behind.. well, you might want to think again honey! are you sure you can turn your back on everything?

kisses and co.

2009-05-09T23:11:00.000+08:00

kasali ka ba sa huling taon ng dekada 80 at mga unang taon ng 90's?

this text message was from my friend karen. :D and it says that if you belong to the later years of 80's and first few years of 90's..

→ Kilala mo si Shaider, Bioman at Masked Rider Black
→ Kumakain ka ng Humpy Dumpy
→ Alam mo ang Universal song na "Uwian Na!"
→ Nagsayaw ka ng Macarena at Bumbastic
→ Alam mo ang meaning ng "Time First"
→ Alam mo ang importance ng "Period! No Erase!"
→ Nilalagyan mo ng Cheese Ring bawat daliri mo
→ Meron kang pencil case na maraming pindutan
→ Naniniwala kang pwedeng manganak ang mga kisses

..ibigsabihin MATANDA KA NA.

i was born year 1992 and..

[ ★ ] i've never heard of shaider, bioman and masked rider black
[ ★ ] but i eat humpy dumpy
[ ★ ] and i know the universal song "uwian na!"
[ ★ ] i know the Macarena steps but i've never heard Bumbastic.
[ ★ ] i say "time first!" when i have to drink water because of the extreme thirst caused by playing langit lupa.
[ ★ ] i say "period! no erase!" after saying "ikaw pinakapangit!" to someone so he/she won't be able to say "ikaw kaya!"
[ ★ ] but i didn't eat cheese rings
[ ★ ] and neither had a pencil case with maraming pindutan.
[ ★ ] but i did put kisses on a cotton ball with rubbing alcohol because i once believed that if i did that, they will reproduce. haha! and i can't believe i wasted tons of rubbing alcohol and cotton balls just to see their offsprings. haha! that was crazy!

5 out of 9? well, i guess MATANDA NA NGA AKO!

it really is a crazy thing.

2009-05-08T23:11:00.000+08:00

but i think it's cute. :]

the best story ever told

2009-05-07T23:11:00.000+08:00

unlike all the other girly girls, my favorite bed time story wasn't Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty nor Snow White..

when i was a little girl, the question that always bothers me was:

"bakit ganun yung leeg ng baka?"

and that was one of my biggest curiosities. since cows are my favorite farm animal, i was very eager to know the story behind their sagging necks. i kept on asking my mom the same question over and over. one night, when we were about to sleep.. i asked my mom.. "ma, bakit ba kasi ganun yung leeg ng baka?" then my mom said, "matulog ka na." but i insisted. i said i wouldn't sleep uless she tells me. so my mom, left with no other choice, decided to tell the story of the cow and the carabao..

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away.. lived the first Cow and Carabao
and a wicked farmer who make them work so much under the heat of the sun.
One sunny day, the cow and the carabao conversed while working..

"No one should work this much everyday!" the cow said. "We deserve a vacation!"

"Why don't we play hooky one noon," the carabao proposed. "while the farmer is
resting in the shade, as he always does when the sun is at its most furious?"

So it was that one noon, while the wicked farmer was fast asleep,
the two friends shrugged off the plow and raced to the nearby river.
They took off their skins, hung them on a low branch of a tree at the
riverbank, and dived underwater. But alas! As they were having
their fun, the farmer woke up, saw that his servants were missing
from the fields were they belonged, took up his whip and went out
searching for them.

By following their footprints, he found them almost immediately.
The farmer frightened the two with his whip and made them
scramble up to the bank.

In their haste to appear decent before their master,
the cow and the carabao accidentaly switched skins.

As the carabao was larger than the cow, his skin sagged
at the cow's neck and belly, and the cow's skin clung
tight to his flesh.

They came before their master, begging to be forgiven.
The farmer said they were forgiven, but they can never take off
the false skins they wore.

and they lived not so happily ever after.

but for me, that was the greatest bed time story ever told. haha!

did i ever tell you you're my hero?

2009-05-05T11:11:00.000+08:00

"Well, sometimes you have to stand back to appreciate a work of art."
--Marge

sometimes, the least expected things happen.. and most of the time, the person that we least expect to come would knock on our doors on a very unexpected day..

and if there's someone who i didn't really expect to enter my life, it's her. i haven't really seen her or met her and i've only heard her voice twice or thrice over the phone. but what i feel when i'm talking to her is really astonishing.. i feel like there's so much connection between us. perhaps, she's really fated to be part of my life.

i call her my ate. and she have been a very good one to me for almost two years now. i know, people say a lot of things about her, some are good and some.. not so good. but i will always love her, no matter what other people say. good or bad, it doesn't matter. nothing matters. because i know she's a good soul. and someday.. people will know.

well, sometimes you have to stand back to appreciate a work of art.

strongly agree. people see things in different ways. sometimes you just have to look deeper to see what's really within. and i'm glad i did that. for i saw a really wonderful artwork. i'm lucky.

now, if there's someone who i really want to thank, it's still her. she's my only source of strength now.

thanks, ate m. :D i owe so much to you.

a little bit of everything

2009-04-25T11:11:00.001+08:00

i'm a super BIG fan of shoes, bags, clothes, sun glasses, nail polish, barbie dolls and gossip girl. define big. i keep a massive collection of these stuff inside my four striking pink walls. one missing piece in my collection would drive me real mad. i worship these things like a venti cup of starbucks caramel frapuccino® blended coffee. and maybe that's why people think i don't engage myself with things that are not so.. girlish. but what they don't know is that i'm also a die hard fan of wrestling, MTV celebrity death match, formula 3 racing and billiards. and i love them just as much as i love kwek kwek. i would break all the rules. haha! yeah. hard to imagine, right? who would think that a girl who changes her nail color every week (or even more frequent than that if she's not pleased. haha!) is actually an avid fan of WWE SMACK DOWN? that's really odd, i think. it's very unusual for a girl to play suntukan with the tough guys. but it seems like i'm not just unusual. because i play Snip 'n Style Salon Game at http://barbie.everythinggirl.com/ too.

sometimes it really confuses me, though i'm 150% sure that i like boys. haha! i just.. can't seem to find my caste. yet, i feel like.. i blend in anywhere i go.

brand new

2009-04-20T11:11:00.000+08:00

i don't know why people say that summer is just a fantasy. some people let themselves fall deeply in love under the heat of the sun. but when the rain starts to pour and it's time to go back to the real world, love birds would turn into strangers again and just go on their separate ways.. as if nothing happened. as if they never fell in love.

and now i'm starting to get what they're trying to say.

summer is just an escape from the busy world. where there's no time to fall in love and dream. where there's not even a single chance to change.

summer is an opportunity to escape from everything. escape from the real you. try to be someone else. go to places where no one knows who you really are. fall in love.

and try to change..

that's what i'm trying to do now. i'm trying to escape from the past. i'm trying to be someone new. i'm trying to be better.

after this summer, i'll go to college. where no one knew the person that i was. what happened, and how much i've changed. i will try to forget everything and start a new life.

i'm going to make sure that i'll do better this time.

and i will never forget this summer.

because this marks the start of my brand new story. :D

soon to rise..

2009-04-17T11:11:00.000+08:00

i tripped over but i stood up.

its midnight and i'm still working on this. i tripped over but i stood up... and then what's next? uh. i don't know. because i'm not sure if i've really recovered from my fall. but i realized; hey, so what if i haven't? i still have my family and friends, right? and as long as i have them, i'm not afraid to fall. and i know that soon i will rise again.

i've been through a lot of things lately. i don't think it would be practical if i would tell you the whole story. it's too long and miserable. series of terrible things happened, and i thought i was about to give up. but here i am.. trying to STAND STILL. :)

i failed thousands of times. but my family and friends didn't give up on me. so why should i give up?

falling is an opportunity to rise.

paano ka nga naman tatayo kung hindi ka naman nadapa, diba?

people stumble and fall. people make mistakes. but what is important is that we learn from them. right? :)

always remember that there's always a room for change. :D

good boys or bad boys?

2009-04-12T23:11:00.000+08:00

oh, that mother chucker."the horniest boy in the upper east side"

..as described by Cecily Von Ziegesar, author of the best selling novel Gossip Girl. there's no other bad boy. it's only him. it's only CHUCK BASS. and it's true. he's really very bad for you. but i know you love him. oh c'mon, who doesn't love Chuck? raise your hand and i'll skin you alive, hypocrite! Everybody loves Chuck Bass. He's like.. super irresistable! LOL.

Yes, he's an ultimate womanizer. But we all saw how romantic he could be when he falls in love. aaa! He's exactly the type of guy that I'm looking for. Full of surprises. He's BAD. but we all know we love him, right?

If loving Chuck Bass is wrong, then I don't ever wanna be right.

Bridget Jones's Bad Boy
"Bridget Jones, wanton sex goddess, with a very bad man between her thighs."

..she's refering to Daniel Cleaver, her boss. and the guy in his fantasies. he's Bridget's first love. and my first love too. LOL. well, sad to say.. i didn't find any appealing words to describe him, except from HOT. omg. define hot! LOL. he's a head turner. he's #1 on the list of all the womanizers in the world. XD and no one can ever explain why girls go crazy over him. i guess, except from the fact that he's TOTALLY HOT, it's because he knows the exact words that would make any girl wanna scream and rip all her clothes off. HAHA!

"come on Bridget, we belong together. You, me, your poor little skirt. If I can't make it with you then I can't make it with anyone."

No wonder why Bridget just can't get him out of her head.
LOL.

Chuck Bass. Daniel Cleaver. The fictional characters that made me fall so deep in love.
The Bad Boys. Never the ideal, but always the one to capture the hearts of many.

Ed and Hugh, thanks for bringing them to life.

i would definitely go for the bad boys!

super dramatic.

2009-03-12T11:11:00.000+08:00

last day of exams. can't believe it.
two weeks from now, we'll be leaving
the portals of CSA.

and we're gonna go our separate ways...

SAD but TRUE.

*sighs*

this day has been super dramatic for me. and it all started while i was looking
at this scene:

"ang lungkot."
yun na lang ang nasabi ko sa sarili ko..

parang nag-flash back lahat ng magagandang
nangyari sa high school life ko.. at lalo lang naging
madrama ang lahat ng maalala ko ang mga salitang 'to:

"high school friends ang friends mo forever...
magkahiwahiwalay man kayo sa college, kayo pa
rin ang magkakasama sa huli..."

-Sir Martin

second year high school ako nang maging teacher ko siya sa Biology, isang
Thomasian RN at isang Agustino... isa siguro yun sa mga dahilan kung bakit
napakagaan ng loob ko sakanya, at di ko malilimutan ang pagdating niya sa
buhay ko...

Ngayon, nasa Australia na siya at doon ipinagpapatuloy ang pagtupad sa kanyang mga pangarap. Ngunit nananatili pa rin siya sa puso ko, kasama na rin lahat ng itinuro niya sa akin... Nagsisilbing inspirasyon upang maabot ko rin ang mga pangarap ko.

...umurong ang mga luhang kanikanina lamang ay malapit
nang maabot ang cheekbones ko. (HAHA)

at bigla kong naalala yung paborito kong linya sa gradsong na
ginawa ko..

"sama samang lilipad, walang iwanan! pagkat pang-habang buhay
ang ating natagpuan..."

sama sama nating pinalipad ang mga lobong yan. maghiwahiwalay man sila,
alam ko namang iisa lamang ang pupuntahan ng mga yan.

isang araw, makikita ko ulit si Sir Martin,
pati ang mga taong 'to...

at hihintayin ko ang araw na 'yon.

ang araw ng muli nating pagkikita...

ANG ARAW NA MAGIGING SIMULA NG PANG-HABANG BUHAY NATING SAMAHAN.

i love you, SEñORES!

a night of major confusion

2009-02-08T23:11:00.001+08:00

it's the time of the year when the juniors and the seniors unite
and sometimes wrangle over the theme song and the like..
it's the time of the year when the girls do not pay attention in
class 'cause they're too busy scanning their fashion mag for
the perfect hair and make up.. while the boys are still doing the
same old stuff, as if they are not excited.

so i guess you already know what i'm talking about...

it's the Junior-Senior Promenade.
yeah, yeah...

well the "highlight" of this event is the turn over ceremony
wherein the Seniors hand over their responsibilities to the
Juniors..

"I, [NAME], hand over this bla bla bla to you [NAME] in behalf of the Seniors... BLA BLA BLA"

very irritating.
(haha! i'm so mean.)

for me, that isn't the "highlight" of the event..

it's the time when all the lights are turned off and everybody's
dancing with their partner.. when you'll see a lot of drama on
the dance floor. different kinds of drama. or should i say
ALL SORTS? hahaha!

sometimes, i just want to sit and watch them from afar where
they wouldn't notice me.. and there are times when i want to
get close to them so i can see and hear things better...

(haha! i'm such a little snitch.)

well, i'm just staggered on how prom night turns everyone
into a dramatic actress. i've heard them all say "I got a bit confused."
and i've seen them all cry.

what's in a dance that confuses a girl so much?
is it really the dance? or the guys?

i can never blame the girls.. they will always be a little too affectionate.

maybe i should blame those guys for giving them major confusions.
they are very unpredictable... day before the prom, they look impassive...
the next day, they'll turn into some romantic shakespeare that will
tease you with their so-thousand-years-ago cheesy lines...

tsktsk. who wouldn't be confused?

i think this is my year. lol.

2009-01-15T11:11:00.000+08:00

it's year of the ox.

wow. i haven't posted anything since january 1.
i've been very busy and i didn't have the chance
to update my blog.

so far, this year haven't just been OK for me but
awesome!

2009 welcomed me with a letter coming
from my "dream University" saying
that i passed their entrance examination.

i was jumping because of so much happiness...
all day long.

cmon, it's your DREAM UNIVERSITY.
who wouldn't be jumping?

hahaha!

sweet... isn't it? LOL.
my dreams are finally coming true!

NO MORE SLEEPLESS NIGHTS.

hello 2oo9

2009-01-01T11:11:00.001+08:00

so, i guess this is goodbye for me and 2008.

brand new life? brand new me? uhmm...
what for?

i always set brand new rules like.. some sort of a
"new year's resolution", but i always end up
breaking my own brand new rules and sticking to
the old ones.

well, you can never set aside traditions.

it's really hard to change something that you've been
doing for almost.. uh, i don't know. forever?

it's not that i hate brand new stuff
but as long as i can keep the old ones,
i'll keep them.

so, i guess it would still be the same old me in 2009.

but i wish i could be a little thin.

hey, it's christmas!

2008-12-26T11:11:00.000+08:00

yeah, it's christmas and i'm effin sleepy.

i'm not used to being home on christmas day. it's kinda sad and kinda boring.
i can't find anything to do, and there's no more space for food in my tummy.
but i realized...

hey, it's christmas! and whether it's merry or not, it's still up to me.

so, i think i'll be signing out now cause i'll be having a GG marathon.

merry christmas, everyone!

savings or collection?

2008-12-23T11:11:00.001+08:00

2oo4 one peso coins...

savings or collection?

-TRIVIA------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

did you know?

2oo4 one peso coins
are made of 100% steel alloy.
unlike the older one peso coins,
they don't fade (unless scratched)
they're more glossy and velvety.

and in case you don't want to believe me...

i have back up:
http://philmoney.blogspot.com/

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i've been... let's just say gathering (i don't wanna use any of the two words mentioned above, that would be bias. XD)

i've been gathering 2oo4 one peso coins since june. and as of now, i've collected 400 one peso coins or simply... P400.oo HAHA! XD i am really attracted to these coins. but i don't really know the exact reason why i wan t to gather these...

is it just because im attracted to it?

or do i have better reasons than that?

>>recently
my mother asked me...
"anong gagawin mo diyan? itatambak mo na lang?"

i was silent. i didn't know what to say.

then my mother asked me again...
"bakit hindi mo ibigay sa mahihirap? pasko naman.."

AGAIN... i was silent. i didn't know what to say.

my mother went out of my room, since i wasn't saying anything...

but she really made me think.

savings or collection?
uh. who gives a damn?!

the question is...

am i willing to give?

what do you think?

poor me!

2008-12-16T11:11:00.000+08:00

since i've been talking about Christmas and Christmas Gifts, let me share you something no one knows..

i can never end the Christmas Season without buying something for myself.
(sort of a gift for myself. LOL.)

this year, i bought myself something VERY AFFORDABLE.
haha! LOL. actually, it kinda exceeded my budget..
(uhmm. actually no, not "kinda" cause it really exceeded my budget!)

hahaha! :D

it's the most expensive gift i've ever bought for myself.

here's how the gift looks like when it's dark..

yes, it's the famous havaianas4NiTe.

actually, i bought it on sale. (but it still exceeded my budget. LOL)
and i almost died trying to get this pair. HAHAHA!
we all know how the havaianas store looks like when they're
on massive clearance sale..

luckily, i survived. :D

but the sad thing was..
i went out of the store

a POOR girl.

/LOL.

MOOre milk.

2008-12-14T11:11:00.000+08:00

i believe that more cow means more milk. ;PP

bakaw and chuckieee! ♥

(DECEMBER ISSUE)

hahaha! LOL.

well, if you don't happen to know them.. they're my favorite stuffed cows. :D
and if you don't happen to know, stuffed cows are my thing. XD my collection.
my LIFE. XD

and if you're finding it hard to think of something to give me this christmas..
well, THINK NO MORE! one stuffed cow will do. hahaha XDDD

cause you know, i donated some of my cows to the orphans. (omg. im so kind!)
hahaha XDDD and i think bakaw and chuckieee would be happier if they would
have new friends this christmas. XDDD

jingle bell time..

2008-12-11T11:11:00.000+08:00

christmas is fast approaching...

and i can really feel the christmas spirit! :D
it's getting colder, and everyone's getting busier.
hahaha! :D

im kinda excited to go shopping with my girls. :D
but im kinda not excited at the same time. XDDD
when i get to think of my budget. LOL.

omg.

15 days to go.

who the hell is BEN?

2008-12-09T11:11:00.000+08:00

hahaha! i have no other choice but to throw away
the empty cup of starbucks..

i really wanted to keep it as a remembrance,
but im afraid my mom would see the name
written on it.

she might think i already have a boyfriend..
and he's named BEN. /lol.

i don't even know who that
BEN is! XD and i have no idea why
his name's written on my coffee.

my goodness! i lost my "katinuan" again!

im GAY, yes. but my name's not BEN!

haha!

oh, but i love this day.. i had a lot of funnn! :D

i love my raptors. ♥

she's gone nuts.

2008-12-02T11:11:00.000+08:00

oh my God. oh my God. oh my Goood! XD

i've gone crazy over:

pluuurk! (omg. i can't resist plurking! especially during times of total karma increase.)
GossipGirl (my one and only source into the scandalous lives of Manhattan's elite. LOL.)
twilight (so, the lion fell in love with the lamb.. my Goood!)

daaamn! i've totally lost my "katinuan"

LOL.

major disappointment :(

2008-11-30T11:11:00.001+08:00

today, we lost.. we lost AGAIN. :'( and to tell you honestly, i don't think we deserve to..

it's not that i don't want to accept defeat but..

i just can't!

we did our best and i think we really
deserve to be called the "champs"

(tissues in hand)

i really feel bad! :'( and i am so crying right now.
cause i feel like.. i'm a total LOSER.

just imagine, we got beaten by a NOBODY..
(well, sorry! i'm just telling the truth and nothing but the whole truth!)

F word. 100x :|

major disappointment.
actually, our goal was to get back what was OURS.
but we FAILED. and it really hurts!!!

i'm so disappointed. :'(

it's like, so 10 years ago..

2008-11-30T11:11:00.000+08:00

wow. it's been like forever since i last posted. hahaha!

17 october 2008?! omg. that was so ten years ago! XD

i haven't posted since i started plurking. LOL.

missed my blog. ♥

goin' back to childhood..

2008-10-18T23:11:00.000+08:00

17 October 2008

well, i wasn't really planning to go w/ them. but see, i ended up goin crazy over
the karaoke. && i had so much fun! i don't regret missing the training, cause i
really had a great time. i love them! :D

this will probably be one of the most unforgettable days in my high school life..

________________________________________________________________

chillin' @ kababy sis' place..

roasted chicken for lunch..

yummy ice cream for dessert..

cha, jam & joy, waiting for their cone. :D

playground.

before leaving.

joyride.

ohh. ilove them much. ♥

stucked in the ela-eelavator...

2008-10-06T11:11:00.000+08:00

05 October 2008

how can i ever forget that elevator trip?
harhar. XD
from 2nd floor - ground floor
from ground floor - 1st floor
from 1st floor - 3rd floor
and finally...
from 3rd floor - our final destination...
the ground floor!
hahaha XDDD
super fun!

the art of "making tawad"

2008-09-28T23:11:00.000+08:00

Tim Tayag shares a few of his tried and tested tips on bargaining -- the Pinoy way.

uh. love this article! :D
i bet you'll love it too.

__________________________________________________________

you get a certain euphoric high when you purchase an item
at a fraction of its original price. especially when you make
the vendor shed tears. but not all of us are born with killer
bargaining instincts, unlike the Chinese who have it hardwired
into their DNA. Fortunately, bargaining or "making tawad" --
as Pinoys put it -- is like martial arts. It's a skill that can be
mastered only with intense training and practice. The following
are simple yet effective tactics for closing a good deal.

Act like you don't really want it

the same way you play the game of love, you can get the
upper hand by acting cool and uninterested in the
merchandise. Yawn and say something like, "Well, it's
not like I really need this cell phone... I can always fall
in line and use the pay phone." If the seller knows you're
dying to buy his product, then he's got you in the palm
of his hands. but if you act uninvolved, you have more
leeway to dictate a lower price.

Mention prices from competing stores

remember, competition always benefits the buyer.
ideally, you've done your homework and checked
the prices in the other stores, both real and online.
If you haven't, it doesn't matter, because you can
also just make something up. most vendors will try
to match or undercut their competition to get your
business. so it iss in your best interest to pit them
against each other like mad wolves fighting over a
piece of meat.

Walk Away

make your final offer, preferably written on
a piece of paper to make it more dramatic.
then say, "don't embarrass yourself... this is
my final offer." shove said piece of paper into
the vendor's hand, then walk away with the
dramatic flair of Vilma Santos or Dame Judi
Dench. most vendors will chase after you and
give in to your price. on the other hand, if the
vendor refuses to go any lower, remeber to put
on a mask or wear a disguise should you decide
to go back in and buy the item. FYI, this tactic
no longer works in Hong Kong.

Point out small defects

if the item has a small scratch or looks
slightly used, it's your job to draw
attention to the imperfection. you
might even create it yourself with a car
key or your fingernail. then say something
like, "boy, this diamond has a lot of flaws...
it's going to be hard to find a buyer for this."
most unsophisticated merchants will knock
off an extra 10% to 20% from the price tag.

Two things to remember:

First, canvas prices and decide the amount
you'll be happy to pay for it. Second, should
the seller agree, buy it. Nothing is more
annoying than a tease -- a haggler who doesn't
make good on his offer.

lovin' my raptors ♥

2008-09-14T23:11:00.000+08:00

I'M BACK. finally! after a very very long time... XD

i haven't finished editing my bday pics and the ncc regionals pics yet.
but i have here some pics taken recently (VERY RECENT, actually.. XD)

13 Sept 2008

quality time w/ my girls. :D

my nff's, ella bitch and aya bitch. ♥

STUDIO PICS.

after having our studio pic, we rocked time zone w/ our singing voices... :D

ella bitch & aya bitch
rockin' the house. XD

funny.

and then we went crazy playin arcade games. XD

and look what we bought...

yeah, common shades. ;PP

before parting...

yeah, right.
the day couldn't really end up w/o striking a pose!

it was quite tiring...
but it was really fuuun. :D
i wanna do it again!

happy birthday to me. :))

2008-09-04T11:11:00.000+08:00

it was indeed a happy birthday. LOL. XDDD

i really had a GREAT day.
thanks to you, guys. :D

bday pics (including bday stories)
will be posted as soon as i am done
being busy. harhar XDDD

B-E-A utiful... :))

2008-09-03T11:11:00.000+08:00

oh God. i really don't know, remember, and understand anything about this book.

well, except for its title... "El Filibusterismo".
uh. how can i ever forget when it gives me loads of
headaches every night..?

XDDD

discover davao :))

2008-09-02T11:11:00.000+08:00

my cousin works for OOCL (a shipping company) as a manager. well, he used to work here in manila until the company relocated to davao. sadly, my cousin have to relocate too, away from his family.

it's already been a year since he moved there, and we all miss him.. that's why we decided to give him a visit :))

from the very moment i stepped on the soils of davao city, i didn't want to leave anymore. XDDD

davao city captured my heart..
it was AMAZING.

well, just to show you all the BEAUTY that i've seen, here are some pictures that i took during our davao trip.

[the hotel.]

the indak indak restaurant :))

i don't know who they are
but i always see them when
i enter and go out of my room.

[jack's ridge]

the taklobo shells.

The land on which Jack's Ridge now stand once formed part of the headquarters of the retreating Japanese forces towards the end of the World War II. The Americans had landed in Davao on May 1, 1945, forcing the Japanese to beat a path to Matina Hills where they had a commanding view of the Davao Gulf where the American ships were anchored. Fierce fighting soon erupted between the two forces, and as history shown us, the Japanese lost. Today, more than half a century later, Jack's Ridge is filled with reminders of its historic past. Caves dug by the Japanese pockmark the area, and once in a while people still find bullets and other war materials in the rocky soil. There are also claims that hidden somewhere in the caves are gold bars and other treasures that the Japanese had taken from other countries and brought to Davao. Whatever the truth is about the treasure, Jack's Ridge maintains the feature that made it an important outpost for the retreating Japanese forces, a commanding view of Davao City and the Gulf, the same view within the premises is also refreshing, since the owner has made its mission to preserve the natural beauty of the place.

i don't really know who the owner is, but he's probably named "Jack"...
LOL. XDDD

the lumad.
i don't really know what this is.
but i think these are sacred sculptures
because there is a sign
(under the sign that says "lumad")
that says: " please do not touch"

the view from jack's ridge

the tanduay vault :))

the bar :))

the pool :))

[the food.]

i didn't know that davao's food was this great. yum!

fresh mango shake :))
yum!

[the philippine eagle center]

[nature]

define BEAUTIFUL. :))

define SERENE. :))

[DAVAO DISCOVERED.]

thanks to my cousin. ;PP

2008-09-01T11:11:00.000+08:00

'How can we feel so different...and be so much alike?'

...i think this is quite a mystery

uh. i need answers.
harhar. XDDD

[just arrived.]

SEIKEI BIJIN

2008-08-25T23:11:00.001+08:00

this story captured my heart...

Title: 整形美人
Title (romaji): Seikei Bijin
Also known as: Artificial Beauty

Synopsis

A woman's life all depends on her looks. So what happens if she's born ugly? This story is about a girl, nowhere near attractive, who was born where ugliness runs in the family.

This pitiful girl, who has no luck with men, thanks to her "not so pretty" looks, turned to her last resort: a face lift. She travels all the way to the Mediterranean to transform into a living beauty. Now she can finally get her hands on love and happiness. After returning to Japan, she starts a glamorous life as a fashion model: something she had always longed for.

Still, day after day, she is obsessed with the feeling that her big secret may come to light. The face lift was able to change her face, but not her "ugly personality."

She's an artificial beauty: vulnerable, fragile, and struggling for love. Will she manage to get the love of her life?

This is the ultimate love story that portrays every woman's dream. Be ready for a hilarious, stylish, gorgeous but sad romance.

Honami Saotome is made out of plastic. She's the artificial beauty. Honami seems to have the ideal life, working as a fashion model. Actually, behind her perfect face is a unfortunate girl, born into a family that has a long history of "the ugly bug." During her childhood, she was bullied for being ugly, and dumped tragically by the boy she liked. To bid farewell to all that and start a new life, she decides to have plastic surgery on her entire body. Thanks to her decision, she now leads the life of a princess. Nobody knows that behind her glamorous lifestyle, is a girl afraid that her secret may be found out, or that her face may fall apart. She struggles with her ugly personality that just won't wash away. Though Honami has the inner strength of never giving up, her arrogance of doing anything for her own happiness is just too much.

The other leading character is Ryusui Fujishima, the heir to a grand master of flower arrangement, whose philosophy is, "flower arrangement starts from hating flowers." Within this friendly gentleman who hates formality, is a lonely heart that won't let others in. This is a man that shows no arrogance despite the position he's in. He's actually tired of high society where relationships are just superficial. Ryusui is a man who values essence more than appearance, whether it's flowers or people. Thus, he is attracted not to Honami's looks, but to her tough and bold personality: like a wild flower growing between rocks.

_______________________________________________________________________

watch seikei bijin on veoh
watch seikei bijin on you tube

FORGET ME NOTS

2008-08-25T11:11:00.001+08:00

yeah, that's how they call the flower.
it's nice, i know, right? :))

i've never really heard anything about this before. actually, i was amazed when i first heard it's name mentioned by shiina kippei in one of the episodes of seikei bijin (artificial beauty)
well, if i wasn't mistaken, that was in episode 6.

the flower was indeed unforgettable. i wasn't able to get it out of my mind. and as a matter of fact (just to exaggerate things more) i even searched the net for some more informations and trivias. HAHA.

forget it or not..

you'll never
forget it.

you just CAN'T.

LOL. XDDD

the road not taken by robert frost

2008-08-25T11:11:00.000+08:00

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black

Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.